by Archdeacon Claire Phelps
Dear Family of St John’s
Over the years I have accumulated a large collection of craft items. My husband feels it’s excessive, I think the contents of the garage are excessive – so, we have some balance!
I have coloured paper and cardboard in many colours, glittery cardboard, corrugated board, foam sheets, glittery foam sheets. I have lots of glitter too – although that is only used with strict controls in place, we don’t want glitter everywhere!
I have glue of every description and enough adhesive tape to wrap around every present I’ll ever need to wrap. Beads, rhinestones, pens, khokis, pencils, paints (all the kinds), acrylic markers, embroidery thread, stencils, stickers, scissors to cut every piece of paper and fabric – and with squiggly edges too.
And, I have ribbon. Boy, oh boy, do I have a lot of ribbon!
Now, my other craft items are organised. I have all my scissors in a container, all the glues together, cardboard and paper stacked in a specific order, and so on for each category of items. But, my ribbons have no system. The only system is that they are all tossed into a LARGE storage container. At one point I tried to organise them, and pack them neatly into the container. But, it never lasts.
I tried to persuade my husband that he should consider my ribbons as an ‘art installation’ and they could be mounted on dowels down the length of our passageway. He didn’t share my vision.
And so, my ribbons have been a problem. Every time I needed to wrap a gift, or find a particular ribbon it was an ordeal. Scratching through the storage crate, making the problem worse, and often just buying another spool of ribbon because I couldn’t find what I needed.
It seems that my youngest son noted my distress and decided that he and his brother would do something about it as my 50th birthday gift. He asked me if he could design a storage system for my ribbons that would make my life easier. I was blown away at the thoughtfulness of this gift.
They have bought me a larger storage container. Created a system that allows 15 vertical dowels secured to a wooden base, which has handles on it so that the whole system can be lifted out. I could probably store in excess of 200 spools of ribbon!! The ribbons have been sorted out, wound up onto spools where they’d become tangled, divided into different widths, fabrics and colours. It is exactly what I needed. And, they tied it up in ribbon to present it to me!
What struck me most deeply was this: I had lived with the ribbon problem for so long that I had stopped believing there could was a solution. I simply accepted the chaos, worked around it, became frustrated by it, and occasionally complained about it. But my sons looked at the same situation with fresh eyes. They could see both the problem and the possibility more clearly than I could.
How often is that true in our spiritual lives too? Sometimes we become so tangled in our worries, disappointments, griefs, or habits that we can’t see clearly anymore. We keep rummaging through the same thoughts and emotions, often making the knots tighter. We may even convince ourselves that “this is just how things are.”
One of the great gifts God gives us is one another. Our Christian life was never meant to be lived in isolation. Scripture reminds us in Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 that, “Two are better than one… If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” Very often God’s help comes through the wisdom, kindness, encouragement, or listening ear of another person.
At St John’s we are blessed with many fellowship groups, Bible studies, prayer opportunities, outreach teams, and informal circles of friendship. These aren’t simply activities to fill a calendar. They are places where people walk alongside one another. Places where burdens can be shared, prayers offered, and perspective given. Sometimes just speaking something aloud to our Christian friends can untangle the confusion in our minds and hearts.
Galatians 6:2 encourages us to “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfil the law of Christ.” We don’t always need someone to solve our problems for us. Sometimes we simply need someone who can sit beside us, listen carefully, and help us see things differently. An outside eye often notices the possibilities we have missed.
There’s another lesson hidden in my ribbon story too. My sons didn’t simply point out the mess – they lovingly helped create order from it. That’s so often the way God works with us. He doesn’t stand at a distance criticising our tangled lives. Instead, with patience and grace, He enters into the mess and begins the gentle work of restoration.
Perhaps this week is an opportunity to reach out: to attend a fellowship gathering, to reconnect with someone, to ask for prayer, or simply to have a conversation over coffee. And perhaps it’s also an invitation to become that supportive “outside eye” for someone else – offering encouragement, wisdom, compassion, and hope.
After all, sometimes the most beautiful gifts aren’t the ones wrapped in ribbon, but the people God places alongside us to help us untangle life.
With love,
Your friend and rector
Claire