Dear Family of St John’s
One of our family traditions at Christmas is that the youngest in the family puts the star on top of the tree. When my eldest was ten months old, he needed some help with this task. He only had the privilege of this role for four years until his younger brother came along. And, that privilege is still the youngest’s.
At one point the children would need to balance on their dad’s shoulders to reach the top of the tree. Then they were old enough to climb a ladder themselves, or tall enough just to stretch!
However, we have a slight problem with our tree. My husband insists on a real tree, I might have moaned about this before. He likes the smell of the fresh pine. I dislike the asymmetry, the prickly needles, pine gum, and creepy crawlies while I have to decorate it. I also dislike having to wire in extra branches to fill in the gaps and only being able to hang decorations that are feather-weight. Anyway, despite my seasonal grumbling we still have a fresh tree each year.
Part of the challenge with a fresh tree is putting the star on the top. The star is heavier than a feather, and the top of a fresh tree is very wobbly. This means I must wire a wooden dowel to the stem of the tree (keeping it camouflaged by branches or decorations, of course) and then the star is placed on the sturdy, but hidden, wooden dowel. Inevitably it’s still a bit wonky, listing to the left or the right. My OCD nature notices this wonky star every time I walk past the tree.
I have a bit of a ‘thing’ about stars on Christmas trees. A tree without a star (or angel) on the top is incomplete, in my opinion. I walk through the shopping centres at this time of the year and do a check on all the trees I pass. I suspect I annoy my family when I point out all the incomplete trees!
I’ve been thinking about my wonky star this week. We’ll be decorating our tree next weekend and so I’ve been wondering if I could do anything more to straighten my star.
And, I’ve made a radical decision! I’ve decided to embrace my wonky star this year.
There’s something about that wonky star that resonates with me at the moment – maybe even more than a perfectly centred one would. It’s a reminder that life isn’t always neat and tidy. In fact, it often feels messy.
Between the hustle and bustle of Christmas preparations, the expectations we place on ourselves, and the to-do lists that never seem to get shorter, we can easily feel like we’re not quite measuring up. Our efforts don’t always align with our goals, and we might find ourselves feeling imperfect. But here’s the good news: God doesn’t expect us to be perfect. In fact, He loves us even when we feel like a “wonky” star.
Living with Imperfection
Advent is a season of waiting and preparation. We remember the birth of Jesus, the Saviour who came into the world to offer us grace, love, and hope. And we focus on preparing ourselves for when He will come again. But as we wait, we might also feel a sense of inadequacy. We look at the mess in our lives and wonder if we’re doing enough, if we’re living as we should. Maybe you’re feeling overwhelmed by the demands of the season, or perhaps the weight of personal struggles has you questioning your worth. But here’s something to remember: Just like that crooked star on top of the tree, we don’t need to be perfect to be loved by God.
Paul reminds us in 2 Corinthians 12:9 that God doesn’t expect perfection but rather a heart that is open to Him. “‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”
When we feel most flawed, that’s when God’s grace shines brightest.
We’re not meant to carry the burden of perfection. Christ came to offer us grace, not to demand flawlessness. When we try to measure up to our own unrealistic standards, we forget that God accepts us as we are. Even when we feel like we’re not doing enough or achieving our goals, God sees us in our imperfection, and He loves us. In fact, He loves us so much that He sent His son, Jesus, to redeem us – not because we’ve earned it, but because He desires to be in relationship with us.
The Wonky Star and the Love of God
Think about the star on top of the tree one more time. It might not be perfectly symmetrical, but it still serves its purpose. It still shines light into the room, guiding us toward the true meaning of Christmas. In the same way, even when we feel like we’re not quite “right,” we still have value in God’s eyes. Our imperfections don’t disqualify us from His love – they are an opportunity for His grace to shine through.
During this Advent season, as we wait for the coming of Christ, let’s give ourselves permission to be imperfect. Let’s remember that God’s love isn’t based on how well we perform or how neatly our lives are put together. Just as the star on top of the tree doesn’t have to be perfect to bring light, we don’t have to be perfect to be loved. Our imperfections are the very things that allow God’s light to shine through us, bringing hope and grace to others.
So, if you find yourself feeling a little wonky this Advent, take comfort in knowing that God’s love for you is unchanging. His grace is sufficient, and in your imperfection, He finds beauty. The star on top of the tree may be lopsided, but it still points us to the true light of the world – Jesus Christ.
Let this Advent be a time to accept the imperfection of our lives and rest in the unshakeable love of God, knowing that we are enough just as we are.
With love
Your friend and rector,
Claire